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Some of the most disturbing recent allegations of sexual assault involve men forcing women to watch them masturbate.Journalist Lauren Sivan says that after she rejected Harvey Weinstein’s attempt to kiss her at a restaurant, he told her to “stand there and shut up,” before jerking off into a potted plant.On a yacht in Cannes, the model Angie Everhart alleges that she woke up from a nap to find Weinstein standing over her while masturbating, his body blocking the cabin door.At least four other actresses and models have told similar stories, which parallel industry rumors about Louis C. jerking off in front of female comics (he dismissed these accusations as “rumors” earlier this year).Of course this sexual perversion isn’t confined to showbiz, either; allegations of this kind appeared several times on the notorious “shitty men in media” list, and men expose themselves to women on subways and city streets every day.In an attempt to understand why men do this, we spoke with Alexandra Katehakis, a sex therapist and clinical director of the Center for Healthy Sex in L. Masturbating is a different form of violence, one that isn’t physical or verbal. Exhibitionists purposefully look to shock their victims because they are angry.They are not looking to make friends or go on a date — these are acts of revenge against women.These men are imposing the body part that is most threatening to a female and in doing so, they are acting out what is called “sexualized hostility” or “eroticized rage” against their prey.
If he just masturbates, he can tell himself that he’s not strong-arming anybody. I don’t know what it’s like to hold a penis and do that.
But from what I know about men, it does make them feel powerful.